Theory of Mind (ToM) is the ability to understand others’ mental states, and that these mental states can differ from our own. Although healthy adults have little trouble understanding others’ mental states conceptually, they do not always succeed in using their ToM. In order to be successful in referential communication, listeners need to correctly infer the way in which a speaker’s perspective constrains reference and inhibit their own perspective accordingly. However, the degree to which listeners manage to successfully make such inferences is likely determined by a number of cognitive and motivational factors. In this talk, I will draw from developmental, cross-cultural, and motivational studies of referential communication to try and understand factors that contribute to successful ToM-use.